Exclusively Online | Spring 2019 Issue

“A Lighter Look”

Rick Meyer's regularly appearing column takes a lighter look at politics and public affairs around the world. This month: "I take the question."

By Richard E. Meyer

Q: I’m hungry. Want to go out for dinner?

A: I take the question.

 

Q: It’s your turn to buy.

A: I’m not certain I would agree with that.

 

Q: You’re getting cheaper all the time.

A: Territory I’m loathe to get into.

 

Q: All right, we’ll eat at home. But first we need to do the dishes. Your turn.

A: I’m not going to wade in those waters.

 

Q: Then how about take-out at Taco Bell?

A: I will not opine on that.

 

Q: Hey, neighbors. You two going out? My weather app says: “Unhealthy Air Quality for Sensitive Groups.”

A: Change groups.

 

Q: Well, have a good time!

A: That I can’t get into.

 

Q: Honey, why do you always fasten your seat belt after you start driving? Don’t you know that half of all car accidents happen within a mile from home?

A: Let’s move.

 

Q: Honey! That was a red light!

A: I’ll take a pass on that.

 

Q: Good evening! Welcome to Taco Bell! How may I help you?

A: Read my report.

 

Q: Honey! It’s a drive thru!

A: I stand by my report.

 

Q: Would you like hot sauce?

A: I defer to you on that.

 

Q: Honey, this is embarrassing!

A: I can’t respond to that.

 

Q: I’ll go inside and get it.

A: That’s out of my bailiwick.

 

Q: Hi, you two. You’re back so soon! Dinner good?

A: I’m not going to speculate.

 

Q: Honey, your editor is on the phone. Where’s your story? It was due yesterday.

A: I take the question.

 

—–

 

The Last Laugh:

“MOSCOW—Saying that he had been ‘totally blindsided’ by the revelations from the recently released findings of the Mueller investigation, a shocked Vladimir Putin reportedly came to the realization Tuesday that he didn’t conspire with Donald Trump’s 2016 presidential campaign after all. ‘What the hell? I worked so hard on this—if I wasn’t colluding with the Trump campaign, who the hell was I colluding with?’ ”

– From the ONION

 

Richard E. Meyer

Richard E. Meyer

Meyer is the senior editor of Blueprint. He has been a White House correspondent and national news features writer for the Associated Press and a roving national correspondent and editor of long-form narratives at the Los Angeles Times.

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